‘Are You Having Fun In Your Marriage?’ by Nikki Bray

This post was first published by Family Life and is used here by permission

Are you having fun in your marriage?

It sounds like a ridiculous question, doesn’t it? After all, most of us got married because we liked being with each other and we had fun. But now, many of us don’t even think about fun. We are just trying to get through the day – making enough money to meet all the expenses, worrying about the kids, and trying to keep the house in some kind of order … Who has time for fun in marriage, anyway?

After being married a while, with work pressures and a young family, there can be a tendency to put our marriage on hold—in fact, to neglect it—thinking ” One day we’ll have time for us”. It really can be a time when there is very little time for you, let alone “us”. And after the children have grown, maybe you’re at home in the empty nest, and you’ve allowed life to get a bit too serious, or dull.

Maybe you’ve been through some tough stuff recently and you’re just feeling worn out. Well I want to suggest to you that it is vital that not only do we make time for “us”, but we make time for us to have fun together – to laugh together, or the consequences can be devastating long term.

Oh how we need to recapture fun in our relationship. We need to laugh together. We need to try something together which we’ve never done before. It doesn’t have to be a big deal: Go for a hike in a new place … attend a cooking class together … take a dance class … go sailing or canoeing … light candles and take turns reading a book on sex out loud. 🙂  And make sure you organise to get together with friends who are refreshers, who make you feel good just be being around them.

One of the things that attracted me to Andy was his ability to make me laugh. Even if it does mean I have to hear his latest joke 10 times in one week.  I also love it when laughter is a part of the family dinner table.  I pray that God would bring our children future spouses who would make them laugh.

Life is hard. We need to lighten up at times. We need to restore a little silliness in our relationships.

So here’s a challenge: On your calendar, set aside two hours in the next week for time alone with your spouse. Write it in ink, not pencil.  Plan to do something crazy and fun.

Of course you don’t have time for this. But can you afford not to?